It's been a good ride

This email was sent to me from god knows where, but it is very funny and true. So I must share...

Dear Former Me,

I'm somewhat at a loss here.... 29 years together, and you just up and drop me like that? Damn that's cold. I guess I can understand, we've been drifting apart for years, and I guess you just wanted to be more "normal", more "mainstream". But David? One letter? I mean after all the crap you had to go through to get this divorce from me, you couldn't pick something like Becks Garcia, or Sir Alex Garcia? At the very least, you could have made yourself David Wright Garcia.

Sigh. Well, we've had some good times together, and you've shown me the world. I now head off to my new life, that of a dispossessed first name... a ronin of names you might say. I guess I wish you all the best, and I hope you think of me from time to time...

Sincerely,

Your former you - Davis 

PS: COOKIES???? MY FINAL FUCKING MEAL WAS COOKIES?!?!??!? Talk about the final insult. I shall leave with my head held high.

PPS: You Douchebag.